Grieving as a Dad and Supporting your Spouse
Grieving as a Dad can sometimes be lonely. You may feel like the only time you can let your emotions out is when you are alone, because you feel like you need to be "strong" when you are around everyone else. There are certainly times when your spouse may need you to be collected, clear headed, and a rock to prop up against, but you do not have to be that way every minute of every day. It is okay to be emotional, upset, vulnerable, even hysterical. You will process your grief in your own time, so do not try to fit your grief into any other mold.
Talk to your spouse, family and close friends. Let them know if you are feeling particularly down on a certain day. You are entitled to have your emotional days, and you will probably find that your spouse, family and friends are more comforted and relieved to see the emotional side of you than you thought. Expressing your grief may help you connect with those closest to you.
Do not neglect your health. The advice to not use alcohol or drugs as a crutch is probably obvious, but also do not forget the benefits of sleep, healthy eating, and regular exercise. You don't have to go on a bodybuilding training regimine, but do pay attention to your sleep patterns and try to at least get a walk or two in each week. It's hard to support others when you haven't taken care of yourself.
Speaking of supporting others, as far as other things you can do to support your spouse, understand that every person grieves differently. You may not always have the same emotions on the same days, and that is okay. The best thing you can do for your spouse is to listen; in fact sometimes your significant other may not need you to say anything at all. Sometimes just being in the room, locking eyes and holding hands is enough. Expect emotional swings from your partner as well as yourself and above all, have grace and forgiveness with each other.